Reverb 10 – Day 24

December 24

Prompt: Everything’s OK. What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead?

I think the moment I had where I realized everything was going to be alright was the day I got the phone call that I had gotten a full time job. My last half of 2009 and first half of 2010 were spent painfully searching for a job for hours a day. I had friends revising my resume for me, telling me what to take out of cover letters, sending me to workshops…and it all seemed to no avail. Thankfully, I was in school, so I had a way to pay my bills, but I felt like my life was lacking purpose. It didn’t help that almost everyone around me had a full time job, and could spend their money any way they chose to (or so I thought, because I know everyone has bills and a lifestyle to maintain). The instant I got the phone call (which happened to come from a friend of mine since he works in HR for the company), it was as if a boulder was lifted off of my shoulders. I hung up the phone and started to cry; not because I was sad, but because I finally felt like everything in my life was going to be ok. I knew I was going to have some hard days ahead of me (which I did) and some days where I’d prefer to be unemployed for the freedoms it provided me with (and yes, sometimes I still do), but I knew instinctively that my life was changed for the better and that I was finally going to be ok. Not just financially, but I’d feel as if my life had some purpose again. In order to keep that discovery fresh, I just have to remember what it felt like to be unemployed, and to feel like I had no purpose. Now that I’m starting to feel like I’m discovering what I was meant to do, I have to keep that hunger alive within me. Dreams die because they’re not nourished, so I have to do what I have to do in order to keep mine alive. Remembering that I’m on the doorstep to the rest of my life (being a 20-something) should keep me grounded enough to realize that I have moves to make, but flexible enough to try a variety of things out. Hopefully, this works…and I get closer to my dreams as the year progresses…

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