I Have Questions…

Those of you that know me well know that I spend almost all day listening to music. Whether it be on YouTube, on my iPod, on Pandora, or on the radio, I always have my headphones in or my music in the car blasting. Music is one of the only things I can relate to all the time! Well, it dawned on me not too long ago that there are a lot of lyrics out here that I just don’t understand. I don’t know where the writers came up with them, don’t know why they were included in the song…I just get really confused sometimes. I chatted my good friend Cheekie up on Gchat hoping that she’d be able to help me find the answers to the questions that I have. Maybe you all out there can find some clarity in this as well…

Stevie Wonder – Ribbon in the Sky
Cheekie: tell me who put a ribbon in the sky for stevie wonder’s love? Like, he couldn’t afford a jet? You know Stevie be PAID and he just threw a ribbon up in the air?
me: LMFAO
maybe that’s how the Goodwill Blimp got started
#shrug
Cheekie: probably so… I’m just saying… Stevie was like, “yeah just toss a ribbon up there and she’ll be cool. Ribbons are purty… I’d imagine.”
me: LOL

Mary Mary – I’m Walking
me: ok, so…Mary Mary…in your new hit, you state a minimum of 87 times that you’re walking. well…where exactly are you walking to? Target? Grocery store? Down the Green Mile?
Cheekie: HAHAHAHA
me: to the bus to head to church?
Cheekie: That is the longest walk evah. Like, they be struttin.
me: to the crossroads?
if they galloped, they’d get there faster
Cheekie: If they going to the crossroads, st. peter gon’ be there like… “ok which mary are you again? Hol’ up! That ain’t eeem your name.”
YES! Galloped. Mr. Ed game proper
me: LOL

Joe – All The Things (Your Man Won’t Do)
Cheekie: aight, so tell me THIS. How come Joe be all philosophical in “Things Your Man Won’t Do” talmbout “what good is a diamond, nobody can see?”
that is some tree in the forest SHAT
me: *ponders the meaning of life*
i mean…
geez, i’m at a loss, that’s truly deep.
Cheekie: I bet. In fact, I think Kay Jewelers should change their slogan to that
better yet…
their competition Cue Jewelers should do it.
I’m not sure if this exists
but my point is, it’s a great slogan
me: you can start a business!
there’s your slogan, BAM
Cheekie: I should!
Be like Cheeks Blings: How prosperous is a diamond, that Stevie Wonder views?
circle of life
pow
me: EEYAHMUNEHHHHH bam!

YC feat. Future – Racks
me: ok i have a question of the young fellow that squawks raps “racks”
the entire gist of the song is racks on racks on racks
well…racks of what?
spice racks? clothes racks?
racks of ribs?
Cheekie: lamb?
mint jelly up in this piece
me: maybe Chili’s can use that song for their new jingle
we got racks on racks on racks of ribs
Cheekie: YESSSSSS
girl call up corporate NOW
me: *scribbles down a note*
Cheekie: as they send you a gift card to thank you
me: hahahaha

Ace Hood – Hustle Hard
Cheekie: girrrrrrl.
i still don’t understand why they say hustle hard. i can’t imagine how anyone could possibly hustle soft
it’s not a hustle then!
me: unless you hustle toilet paper, teddy bears, goat cheese, or pound cake
Cheekie: not pound cake doe
*drools*
but anyway, i guess you can hustle soft because he claims to do it “each and air’way”
so i assume that includes hard, soft, just right
it’s the goldilocks of rap
me: thats what she saiiiiid!
Cheekie: HA!
i do wonder how many different ways it is to hustle, doe. Like, can i hustle even when i’m breathing in and out?
i guess that’s when you have asthma
me: or bronchitis
Cheekie: hmm, which i’ve had
so i can relate
me: can you hustle underwater?
or is that reserved for Michael Phelps?
Cheekie: synchronized swimming?
me: oooooh good one.
Cheekie: phelps is gangsta
i also think dirk nowitzki is related to him somehow
perhaps a distant cousin
me: i’d agree

Nicki Minaj – Did It On Em
me: ok nicki…in your new hit “Sh*tted on Em”, you state repeatedly that you have, in fact, sh*tted on em…well…don’t you think that’s kinda disgusting? doesn’t that violate a health code somewhere?
did no one have toilet paper for you? who hurt you?
Cheekie: i think she should’ve considered hustling soft and she would’ve had toilet paper
and it is quite disgusting. she has a large rump. imagine what comes outta THAT a-hole. lawd.
actually don’t
don’t imagine it
me: yeah, thanks for ruining my appetite for the next 3 days.
Cheekie: it’s called the “gross out” diet. Hopefully it works for me. lol
me: like she tells us she sh*tted on em, then says “man i just sh*tted on em”…is that for emphasis?
do these people have access to a shower?
Cheekie: like the “man” makes it official
oh gawd i hope so!
YMCA!
me: right apparently before that man was added, we weren’t sure if she had, in fact, sh*tted on em
LOL
Cheekie: *snort*

So as you see, we have questions! I mean, we tried to answer them for each other, but…we didn’t get too far. Can ya’ll help two lacking all sense ever sistas out? Drop a line in the comments and let us know!

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  1. BWWWAAAAAHHHAAAHHHAAAAAA

    • Does this mean you think this was funny? It’s not! I have real pressing questions about the validity of these lyrics!

  2. You guys….are so stooooooopid.

  3. It’s obvious that the two of you need to be supervised at all times!

      • keisha brown
      • June 16th, 2011

      ^^^ what she said too. LMFAO

    • Two of who? I’m perfectly capable of functioning without supervision…now Cheekie? She may need constant supervision…

      • Cheekie
      • June 16th, 2011

      “It’s obvious that the two of you need to be supervised at all times!”

      Which is funny considering that the person with the LEAST sense? Is the one that you’re closest to in terms of distance. See how things work themselves out? 🙂

    • Cheekie
    • June 16th, 2011

    I just re-read this and asked the man behind the curtain (that I ain’t sposed to be paying attention to) for a brain.

    • You need to…I think all of the sense in this friendship was bestowed on me…which is fine! 🙂

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